200th Post and Celebrating Two Years

Happy Anniversary to the Blog!


Yes, here at FITNY (no, that’s not a chic New York gym—it’s Funny Is The New Young) we’re turning two years old, and this is my 200th post! That seems worthy of celebration. In other words, let’s have some cake. So while you dig in (chocolate layer cake with chocolate icing) feast on my 200th offering. And as they used to sing in the theme song to Golden Girls, thank you for being a friend!

In all the years I’ve been writing this blog (yeah, I think ‘two’ can be ‘all’) I have refrained from getting political. And that’s not easy for me. I’ve been a news junkie for as long as I can remember, and I thrive on listening to and reading about all things political.

But I decided before FITNY ever saw the light of day that it would be neutral, politically. No commentary, no opinion. Just those slice of life stories that (I hope) make you laugh.

And even I get overdosed on the political at times, and this week has definitely been one of those times. It’s been hard to keep from shrieking at the ‘leaders’ who have their moments in front of the camera and use them to blame others, no matter which party they represent.

So please believe me when I tell you that what you are about to view is completely apolitical. It’s a simple observation that the gentleman who is third in line to the presidency was recently seen quoting Sheldon Cooper (played by Jim Parsons) of The Big Bang Theory. This is frightening. Not politically, but socially. Sheldon is brilliant, but insufferable.

I recently caught a news snippet of John Boehner, Speaker of the House, (and yes, if you remember your high school civics class, you know that in the event of the unthinkable, and the president AND vice president were both incapacitated, John “Cry Me a River” Boehner would become President of the United States.) Boehner was in front of a microphone saying, “If ands and buts were candy and nuts, every day would be Christmas.”

http://www.cbsnews.com/video/watch/?id=7110956n

Now I admit to being a little sheltered at times, but the only other time I had EVER heard that expression was earlier this year on The Big Bang Theory, when Sheldon told his friends, “If ifs and buts were candy and nuts, we’d ALL have a merry Christmas!” Which, to be fair, rings a little sweeter than the Boehner version.

[Sorry, but despite my best efforts, I could not find the clip of this rare and special moment in the annals of situation comedy to share with you, my treasured readers...]

So if we were worried about leadership, set those fears aside. Speaker Boehner is taking his cues from a genius-level Ph. D. physicist: Sheldon Cooper. Even if he is fictional. Hey, the guy’s won an Emmy and a Golden Globe, so at least he’s distinguished.

Check it out. And wipe the cake crumbs from your chin—there’s no candy and nuts to be found here, and Christmas is nearly five months away. Good thing there's an anniversary to celebrate! Cheers!

The Post-Surgical Supplies

Note:  Today is the first anniversary of Funny Is the New Young!  Cake is being served, so please help yourself to a generous slice.  I'm always glad you came by!


As moms, there isn’t much we won’t do for our kids, right? And this is especially true after they make us grandmothers! As they say at Grandparents.com, it’s great to be grand.


Anyhoo, I was the designated driver/runner of errands/chief cook and bottle washer/tidier/ laundress and “other duties as assigned” as my old employer used to say, at my recent stay with my daughter and her family when she was having her second son. Do you need me to tell you how much I relished that role? (I also relished the roll, when I made hot dogs, but that’s not important right now…)

So, I was saying… There I was, always at the ready, panting like a puppy waiting for the rubber ball to leave its master’s hand, hoping for a helpful assignment on my daughter Rachel’s first morning home from the hospital.

Bingo! “Mom, could you do me a favor?” Hey, that is exactly what I’m here for, at least during the moments that I’m not holding the new little guy. “I bought the pads the surgical instruction sheet told me to get, but they’re awful. Do you mind going to the store for me?”

Great, just give me specifics, and I’ll be on it like white on rice.

“Well,” she said, “I can’t really tell you exactly what to get, I just know I can’t use these. They’re ginormous.” Actually, given the situation, perhaps that should be spelled ‘gynormous’. “I need something smaller and, well-- wearable.”

Big is bad? I wondered aloud. Post surgery? Isn’t big good in this case? I realize that my child-bearing years are behind me, but still…

That’s when she gave me a little demonstration. Here’s the way this story, ahem, unfolds…

“See?” she said. “They’re way too big to wear!”

Wow, I had never seen anything like it. I even took out a tape measure so that you could see that one of these babies is a full 14” long. Put wheels on it and it’s a skateboard.

 

I went to the store supremely confident that I could select the right product. How hard could it be to scale back from the Mondo-Gigundo-Unspeakably Absorbent design? Then I stepped into the aisle of ‘feminine hygiene products’. I was shocked to see the number and assortment of sizes, weights, shapes and styles. Reading the packages took forever. Overnight, super-absorbent, ultra-absorbent, with wings, wingless, scented, holy smoke, I was floored! The comparison and analysis took a while, but I made a decision, and went on my way.

When I got home, Rachel asked me what I bought. I think I got the ostrich-type—you know, flightless? I told her. “You mean without wings?” Exactly. And two steps down from the ones you had.

“Mom… “

“They’re not skateboards, honey. I think they’re more like flip-flops.” At least they open in two steps instead of four. A significant improvement.

And now, dear readers, your cake, as promised!

Take as much as you want, no calories and no guilt!  Enjoy! I'm always glad you came by.

And the Answer Is...

Yes, yes, I know I promised the answers to yesterday’s puzzles!


Sacramento can be broken into ‘scent’ and ‘aroma’. Cool, huh? And the number puzzle is 2345X6/7=2010. I just love stuff like this.

See you here Monday, August 9th, which will be the first anniversary of Funny Is the New Young. No gifts, please, but there will be a celebratory cake, hats, and festive balloons! Wa-hoo!